Ways to Find Time for Your Spouse

With the rush of today’s life it is hard to make time be a parent and an attentive spouse.  We all know that a strong marriage is the base to provide our kids with stability and security.  How do you make time for your spouse and your marriage? Here are some tips:

Plan a Date once a month:

When you schedule your au pair hours, make sure you plan at least one night a month to go out with your spouse.  Go out to watch a movie, go to a museum, treat yourselves to a nice quiet dinner.  It’s not what you do that matters. The important thing is that you spend time together having fun. Date nights are a time to connect and talk like adults, ignore the “business” of life (bills, parenting issues, in-laws), and just spend time together! Even when you’re married, it’s important to continue to get to know each other and talk about everything from the weather to your feelings, hopes, and plans for the future. We all grow and change over time and “dating” is a great way to keep in touch.

Explore the Little Things

Take advantage of smaller encounters and moments to let your spouse know how much you love them. When you see each other at the end of the day, stop what you’re doing, greet each other, and talk briefly. Offer compliments, and do them a favor (or two!) without being asked. Don’t take your spouse for granted. Show them often that you care.


When we have kids, we are constantly interrupted by them, to the point where we forget how to listen to our partner’s talk.  Make time for small talk and meaningful discussions. You don’t need hours to connect, just some uninterrupted time. Communicating and working together to solve problems are key to maintaining  healthy relationships.   Ask your au pair to take the kids out for a walk or play in the park while you and your spouse have the space to talk.

Do It Together

Take up a hobby, enroll in a class, or pursue an activity you both enjoy.  Having an Au Pair at home gives you the advantage, and flexibility of scheduling time toenjoy yourselves as a couple.  If you can’t agree on an activity, consider creating a list of experiences you’d each like to try and alternate from one list to the other. You may find that regardless of the activity, the opportunity to spend time together as a couple makes the event worthwhile!

Parenting is stressful. It’s no wonder many couples let their marriages run on autopilot while they devote their energy to the kids. While it’s important to give your kids your love and attention, it’s just as important to maintain a healthy marriage.


Monday, 5 September 2011 10:49 PM


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